Can I have my steering wheel back please.

So the Insider was a lovely party full of lovely people and it went off pretty much without a hitch. Except I hear someone pulled the aerial and badges off Billy Wood's car and I know my blue mazda mx5 at the top of the parking field looked a bit neglected but someone pinched the steering wheel and the stereo. Anyone who provides information about who was responsible can have free tickets and hospitality for next years party and a reward of £100.

The local police think it was a pretty crappy move too and have agreed to take my car (which is otherwise immobile) to the lab for a wee examination but if you saw someone camping out with a black leather steering wheel and a silver stereo please let me know and you could save them the trouble. There are a few likely names knocking about already and hundreds of photos from the party from which to identify whodunnit.

Thanks very much,

Walter.